4. Features a highly paid actor (Diane Lane) to appear in about 12 seconds of the movie.
So, as you probably guessed, Jumper did all those things, but sadly the only emotion that it pulled from me was when my contacts dried and I forced myself to cry (yes I can do that, be jealous) just to rewet them. Then the stranger sitting next to me saw me crying and thought it was because of Rachel Bilson’s powerful acting and then he started crying, and sooner than later everyone else was balling their eyes out. (that didn’t happen, this is a terrible review.)
That being said there are reasons to check this thing out. People like The Fast and the Furious because we as a society like speed (not the drug Pete Rose, watch it with the jokes.) This movie had crazy speed (and might have been better on drugs) which should bring in a solid box office number.
Also Rachel Bilson is obviously an attractive young lady, but I’m starting to question the characters she picks in movies. I’ve only seen her in two, but in The Last Kiss she’s tries to break up Zach Braff and his preggers gf by having sex with him (classy stuff,) and in this one she sleeps with someone that is clearly a felon and that she thought was dead for 10 years because her bf at the time killed him just because he was back, stared at her while she worked for 45 minutes and took her to Rome, without asking any questions. Girl has no standards.
My suggestions, instead of going to see Jumper, you should literally jump into traffic, then jump out. Then back in, and then back out.
Then give me the money you would have spent and we’ll call it even.
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